The Perfect Sleep Plan
My CBT-I doctor and I worked together on a personalized plan so I could finally get some sleep. The bones of it are based on research and the experiences of other patients; the flesh is my own personal goals and quirks. I truly wish I could always follow this plan. When I’m able, I say a prayer of thanks to the doctor, and when I can’t, I ask for forgiveness.
The bedroom should be dark, cool, and quiet. It is okay to have pets sleep on the bed; new research has shown the benefit of companion animals while sleeping. The bedroom should only be used for sex and sleeping. One should only lie in bed to actually go to sleep. That is, do not play games on the phone for an hour before sleep or scroll Reddit for an hour upon waking.
Get out of bed and look at the sun. This is difficult because I live in Portland.
Always use the CPAP. This is the easiest rule to follow; I literally cannot breathe without it.
Do not take naps! If you absolutely must take a nap, it should be no longer than 45 minutes. Thirty is even better. Avoid a full sleep cycle. And if you have made the horrendous decision to nap, try to time it so it is approximately eight or nine hours before bedtime.
Stop drinking caffeine at 1:30. One o’clock would be better but that’s when my shift starts, and the thought of starting work without iced tea is unbearable.
Go to sleep and wake up at the same time every day. Obviously. That’s usually number one on the listicles.
Of course, the real perfect sleep would be: lay down, close eyes, fall asleep immediately, no snoring, no getting up to use the bathroom, and waking seven to nine hours later.
